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What can you do to help protect yourself and your children?

Start by making the following pledge to yourself:The following steps are my plan for increasing my safety and preparing to protect myself in case of further abuse.  Although I can't control my abuser's violence, I do have a choice about how I respond and how I get to safety.  I will decide for myself if and when I will tell others that I have been abused, or that I am still at risk.  Friends, family and coworkers can help protect me, if they know what is happening, and what they can do to help.

2. If I am injured, I will go to a hospital emergency room or doctor and report what has happened to me.  I will ask that they take photos and document my visit in writing.

3. I can tell my family, co-workers, boss, or a friend about my situation.  I feel safe telling:

4. I know where I can go for help and where I can tell someone what is happening to me.  I will keep phone numbers and change for phone calls with me at all times.  I can call any of the following people for assistance or support if necessary and can ask them to call the police if they see my abuser bothering me.

5. I will make up a 'code word' for my family, co-workers, or friends, so they know when to call for help for me.  My code word is :                             

6. I will also make up a 'signal' with a trustworthy neighbor to signify trouble (for example, if the porch light is on during the day, the neighbor should call the police). 

My signal will be:                

and my neighbor is:                   

7. I will plan and identify with my children a safe place for them.  If possible, a neighbor's house where they can go for help.  I will reassure them their job is to stay safe, not to protect me.  

My children's safe place is:                    

8. I will document and keep any evidence of physical abuse (ripped clothes, photos of bruises and injuries, etc).  I can keep this evidence with someone I trust. 

That person is:                                              .

9. I will keep important items with someone I trust.

10. I will plan the safest time to get away.

11. I will contact a shelter to find out about laws and other resources available to help me before I have to use them.  A shelter can help you further plan ways to protect yourself and your children and find the support you need.  For a list of shelters and resources in Collin County, click here .

12. I will file a police report and consider getting a restraining order if I feel that my children and I are in danger.  A restraining order legally compels the abuser to stay away from you or s/he can be arrested.  Be aware that papers filed for a restraining order or police report may become public record.  Put only necessary information in the papers and only provide a post office box address.  (Note:  Some abusers may react to a restraining order by escalating the violence.  It is important to consider what the safest option is for you before obtaining a restraining order.  A shelter or agency can help you assess these options.)